Self-Worth, according to the ever reliable Google Search engine is defined as “the opinion you have about yourself and the value you place on yourself.” The example that is given to provide more clarity about what is self-worth is the belief that you are a good person who deserves good things – or vice versa.
We all know I love to ask a million dollar question…so here it goes – what if your self worth? And how does your self worth either support or deter you from self-care? Here is the thing…everything we do takes effort. Period. From brushing your teeth, to ironing, to cooking to sex…it’s all, as my girl Riri likes to say, work work work work work.
Developing your self-worth, like all the other things we do requires purposeful and intentional action that is only geared to elevate the perception of yourself. Developing one’s self worth may be some of the most selfish work you ever do, but the outcome lays such a strong foundatin that you become almost invinceable. Further to this when you come to a place where your self-worth is so elevated, your natural instinct is to preserve this sacred state by nourishing your mind, body, soul and spirit through self care. And when I say self care I am not talking the bubble bath, chocolate cake or massage type of self-care. I am talking about the deep type of self care where you start to bring concern to others that your love for yourself may be excessive!
When we place value on ourself, we also start to shift our inner thoughts from ‘what I am willing to accept for myself’ to ‘what I am not willing to accept.’ To the naked eye it may appear that I am basically saying the samething just one in an affirmative tense and the other in a negative tense…but when we dig deeper they are actually quite different. You see often when we say “I am willing to accept xyz” what comes after is a long laundry list of things that you are willing to accept, willing to tolerate and willing to sacrifice in the name of someone or something else. Because self worth is also so closely tied to people’s perception of us, we often find ourselves still making exceptions to our own rule to ensure that those around us are happy with us, thereb by validating our self worth.
When you say “I am not willing to accept xyz” there is actually no exception or exemption to the rule – it’s just straight up no because you are unwilling to accept, tolerate or sacrifice anything that jeopardizes your self worth. If we take it one step further, not willing to accept things that affect your self worth also means that self care is what is fueling your self worth and not other people’s perception.
Putting yourself on a pedestal allows those around you to see the platform that you are working from, provides insight to those around you on how they need to engage with you…and for my ladies out there…it absolutely acts as a shield to those who try to step to you incorrectly.
