Today marks ‘Bell Let’s Talk Day.’ Initiated in 2010, this campaign was created by the Canadian telecommunications company Bell Canada to raise awareness and combat stigma surrounding mental health in Canada. I promise you this Blog is not a history lesson on Bell Let’s Talk, and whether you believe in it or not (I know there are very mixed emotions about it) it always starts a conversation and at the very least brings attention to the concept of “normalcy.”
Normal. Standard. Typical. Expected. Conventional. Habitual. Regular. Routine. Traditional. If the desired state of mind and/or life is reflected in the words above, is it fair to say that there is actually no one on this earth that has achieved this and therefore we are being encouraged to seek something that is completely none existent.
Here is where I am coming from. Today my best friend posted a powerful post that exposed a level of vulnerability that very few of us ever allow others to see. In this post she spoke about her continued struggle with mental health and her need to create a sense of ‘normalcy’ around her in an effort to create comfort for those who come into contact with her. That the idea of making someone feel uncomfortable with what she was dealing with required her to act ‘normal’ so that they didn’t feel ways. That she was required to act engaged, or interested or happy with what was happening around her because it was abnormal to be any other way. That she was not in a position to say no because any ‘normal’ person would say yes. That being abnormal was a state of mind that she had complete control over it and if she just pressed the little button on her left ass cheek that everything would be back to normal! And so I ask the million dollar question – what the fuck is normal?
I am wife. I have a fear of wet leaves (literally only 4 people know that!). I have three kids. I sweep my kitchen floor at LEAST 5-6x/day. I live in a house. I work. When I pump gas I always have to land on a number that is divisible by 2 or 5. I train 4-5 times a week. I know by society’s standards some of the items in this list are not deemed normal, but who’s yard stick are we using?
If normal is synonymous with the word standard or traditional and I am deemed “normal” than I can also assume that everyone pumps their gas to a number that is divisible by 2 or 5! No?
Here is what I am trying to get at – fuck seeking normalcy cause normalcy DOES NOT EXIST! I don’t want a best friend who is not passionate about her convictions and unwilling to stand up for or against something even if it “goes against the grain.” I don’t want a best friend who is always going to turn the other cheek because she doesn’t want to make others feel uncomfortable. I don’t want a best friend who feels like she can’t voice her opinion because she doesn’t share the same sentiments as others. And I definitely don’t want a best friend who’s ‘normal’ just like me!
Today I honour those who have lost their lives or are living with mental health and/or mental illness. As we educate and bring awareness about mental health in hopes of ending the stigma, I ask that you not encourage people to go back to ‘normal’ but empower them to just be.
